Tuesday, October 07, 2008

How to call a campaign office

Cheery Volunteer:
Good afternoon, Elizabeth Dole Campaign Headquarters.

Me: Hello. I'm an independent voter and I'm calling to verify whether a flyer I received today was endorsed by Mrs. Dole's campaign.

Cheery Volunteer: OK

Me: It says "Godless American pac wants to remove 'under God' from the Pledge of Allegiance and now they want Kay Hagan in the U.S. Senate. Does the Dole campaign support the message of that flyer? 

Cheery Volunteer: Yes, it does.

Me: Wow! What a relief! Because I just want you to know that this flyer has helped me make up my mind as an independent voter.

Cheery Volunteer: Really? Thats great!

Me: Yes, because I could never vote for any candidate who would send this kind of nonsensical crap to voters. This is swill. It's fear-mongering swill, and shows the mentality of a candidate and political party that would rather exploit religious differences than address the issues that voters really care about, like this tanking economy. So I'm voting for Kay Hagan.

Cheery Volunteer: What? Uh...I mean...Can I?

Me: No. There's really nothing you can do, unless you want to advise your candidate to stop letting fringe elements run her campaign. It's a real turn-off to us independents. Everybody loves to say "God Bless America," but it's been said God helps those who help themselves. If Senator Dole wants to do something truly righteous, maybe she could start with doing her job because it sure looks like she and her colleagues have been asleep at the switch. Thanks for your time, and have a good day.



laughingwolf said...

lol... now THAT'S brilliant :D

Morgan said...

Thanks. I was so mad it was all I could do to remain as composed as I was. The GOP is especially noxious in N.C. And so intolerant. My daughter teaches at a rural school where almost everyone is of the Mindless Conservative ilk. She put a Obama sticker on her car and yesterday when she was at work someone tried to rip it off.

Anonymous said...

Morgan: Digital Cowboy put up a post for you.

JohnR said...

So is your vote for Kay Hagan a reaction to Dole's flyer, or is it because you think Kay Hagan can clean up the mess Barney Frank made?

I mean I do want you to vote on the issues.

Christopher said...

Thank you, Morgan, for standing up for the issues. Idiots, homophobes, racists, and religious bigots have been defining the issues for far too long and using their concerns to distract us from the things that really matter. It's sad that things like tolerance, freedom, and respect are issues that divide people. If they weren't maybe people like Kay Hagan would actually be able to focus on the issues, and not have to worry about lunatic smears.

Lu' said...

HA! Excellent.

Morgan said...

I'm voting on both issues, JohnR.
The first issue is that I do believe Kay Hagan can do a better job cleaning up the economic mess than Dole, who has fiddled as Rome has burned. The other issue is my firm belief that politicians who pander to the extreme right wing will be beholden to them, and will pay them back with right-wing judicial appointments, which I also oppose.

Andrea said...

I admire your restraint.

JohnR said...

And these issues are....?

Did Dole vote for the bailout. Then vote against her.

Would Hagan have voted for the bailout?

And if yes, she deserves your vote, why? If she would have, then she has no clue about economics and she will not be any different than Dole.

The govt. is the problem, not the solution. I thought you knew that.

Obama is going to win so why are you worried about right-wing judges who invariably move center-left when confirmed.

I get solicitations from the ACLU once in awhile but I don't call them up in a huff complaining about their godless, Jewish, homosexual, Communist organization and why I don't support them, and take me off their godless, Jewish, homosexual, Communist mailing list.

I put it in the recycle bin.

Andrea said...

Johnr says "godless,""Jewish," and "homosexual" like those are all bad things.

But at least he has warm fuzzies for planet Earth.

Morgan said...

JohnR, perhaps you wouldn't have called. But perhaps you aren't that turned off by a candidate who uses fear-mongering. Perhaps you think political pandering and fear-mongering is somehow bold and forward-thinking. But here in North Carolina I can tell you that it is a staple and I'm not the only person who has gotten sick of it.

If you read my post, and I'm wondering now if you did, you'd see that I didn't call complaining about right-wingers, but Dole's tactic of using divisive tactics to earn votes when there are larger issues that need to be addressed in this campaign.

Now, if I had gotten similar material from Kay Hagan, I may still be on the fence. But I didn't. I only got one kind of mailing like that, and it was from Libby Dole.

Morgan said...

Per the bailout, JohnR, Libby Dole voted against it while Hagan hasn't taken a position on it.

Libby Dole has voted with the GOP 90 percent of the time. So I can't give her much credit for not slamming the barn door because she feared it would hurt the cow she helped let out.

Christopher said...

Johnr and I actually made similar points: Dole's flyer is not asking voters to decide on the issues, it's playing to fears that have nothing to do with the issues. Morgan, I assume you're making a decision at least in part based on the fact that Dole is actually running away from the issues.
What I find most surprising is Johnr's statement about "the mess Barney Frank made". I'm not so naive as to believe that a single member of Congress has that much power. Besides, whatever his contribution may be, Frank's not a member of the party that's been in control of Congress for most of the last fourteen years. The people on the other side of the aisle from Frank bear at least as much responsibility for the current mess. And let's not overlook the guy in the White House...you know, the businessman who drives everything he touches into bankruptcy.

JohnR said...

Morgan: If divisive tactics were something new, I guess you could be upset but this has been going on for more than a 1000 years.

America is nothing special here.

You focus on outrage over political tactics and ignore the elephant in the room.

The economy is going to tank and tank hard. If McCain had any sense he would quit and leave the mess to Obama. I belong to a subscription website and one of the members has in-laws in China and he claims half of them have been laid off. China is going to undergo a major contraction in the next two years.

Look for the next administration to give us monetary inflation, Federal deficits, lower short-term interest rates, and more Federal regulation.

I would be willing to bet that the next President will be a one-term President.

Christopher: To quote Rep. Frank, "I'm willing to roll the dice a little longer."

He crapped out.

His response is to call the Repugs racist.

Yeah, that's not divisive, is it?

To move anything in the Senate, you need 60 votes. Bills to tighten up mortgage rules at Fannie and Freddie never got anywhere because the Senate could not get a few Dems to go along.

And at the risk of seeming homophobic, it doesn't help Barney that he was dating a player at Freddie, now does it? Or was it at Fannie.

And now Obama has the enablers working for his campaign. Shouldn't they be on trial for doing what Enron did?

You are right that both parties have blame but I would have to give more of it to the Dims. It was the Clinton Adm. that really loosened the ties and threatened banks with fines if they didn't loan money to people who probably could not pay it back. George Bush should have put a stop to it.

The major culprit in all of this is Alan Greenspan.

Oh, and the Repugs only controlled the House for 12 years and the Senate for 8 before the Dims took the Senate back for 2 years and then the Repugs got it back for 2 years.

Morgan said...

JohnR, just because something has been around forever doesn't mean I have to keep putting up with it.

Yes, the main issue is the economy, but regardless there are other things that I consider issues too. Just as you wouldn't want a flaming liberal in office, I don't want a staunch, right-wing conservative with a running mate who looks up to a Kenyan witch hunter and wants creationism taught in schools to be in any position of national authority.

Per the crisis, there is a lot of blame to go around and I don't know why anyone would want the job either. But I'll tell you that John McCain's record combined with his temperament and unhinged behavior discounts him in my mind as being fit to lead this nation at this time.

As far as Barney Frank goes, if you keep bringing him up, JohnR, I'm going to start thinking you have a man-crush on him.

JohnR said...

Morgan: I don't want either type in office.

Barney Frank, ugh, could you imagine that turtle mouth coming at you.

I wouldn't let him blow me even if he promised to take his teeth out.

I keep bringing Frank up because he is the head of the Banking Committee, you know, the bunch that brought us the bailout.

If it was some other Rep, I would be using his or her's name.