Saturday, December 30, 2006

Saddamian Rhapsody

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Saddamian Rhapsody
(To be sung to the tune of "Bohemian Rhapsody," with apologies to Freddie Mercury)
Copyright 2006 - 2007 The Token Hippie

Is this the New Iraq
Is this just fantasy
Condemned by infidels
No escape from judiciary
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see-
I’m just a despot, I get no sympathy
And now it’s easy come, easy go
They‘re hanging me, this blows
But even though this blows, doesn’t really matter to me
To me

Allah, I killed some Kurds
Rained down gas upon their heads
Ethnic cleansing, they were dead.
Allah, my fun had just begun
When Bush came in and drove me away
Sunnis, oooooo
Hear my battle cry
I won’t be back tomorrow but
Let violence carry on, carry on as if my death didn’t matter

Too late, my time has come
But I’m not gonna whine
Like I did in court that time
Goodbye everybody - I’ll just hang here
And leave you all behind to face the troops
Allah, oooo (anyway the sand blows)
It’s my time to die
I sometimes wish I’d never invaded Kuwait at all-

I see a hooded silhouetto of a man
Oh Shiite, Oh Shiite. I’m sure he’s not Baath party
Oh and now they’re videotaping, this is irritating to me…
Gallow-dayo, gallow-day,
Gallow-dayo, gallow-dayo
Gallowdayo, oh no.
I was once a poor boy nobody loved me.
He was a poor boy from a poor family.
Spare him his life from this monstrosity
I’m the rightful leader here --will they let me go--
(Iraqi government) We’re in control. We will not let you go
(Bush) We’re in - I mean they’re in control. They won’t let you go.
(Kurds) Whoever’s in control will not let you let him go
Will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no-
Be that way, be that way don’t let me go
Cause Allah akbar, there's virgins set aside for me, for me, for me!!

So you think you can hang me and make it all right
So you think you can hang me and end this big fight
No way, no fucking way
It won’t change a thing, won’t change thing over here

It won’t really matter
Anyone can see
Killing me won’t matter, this will end up as World War III.

43 comments:

Andrea said...

Awesome - you had me singing the whole thing like a crazy person! Should I ask what the inspiration was for this?:)

Hope you have a fun New Year's, and a great start to 2007!

Morgan said...

Thanks, Andrea!
I was at work last night when they executed Saddam and just before the execution started toying with a parody of Bohemian Rhapsoday. I promised my editor I would go home and do the entire parody. When I mentioned it to another blogger in private email, he suggested I make a post of it. So I did. It was fun.

We're going to have a lowkey new Year's celebration, I think. With family visiting this past week we never got around to making reservations anywhere and any place we'd want to go is probably booked solid.

I hope you have a great New Years as well!

Anonymous said...

I hate hippies but that's some funny shit!

CJ said...

That is really funny and clever. But what kind of hippie pokes fun at an execution. I thought you were all peace love and sunshine.

Morgan said...

That's actually funny, CJ, since someone recently wrote me to say that I wasn't a "real" hippie. I wrote back, offering to turn myself in to whatever regulating authority licensed hippiedom. Sadly, my critic never wrote back.

I'm actually opposed to the death penalty, even for wild-eyed dictators. But as I told someone recently, the wheels of justice move slowly and what I cannot change I can still poke fun at. And as a target, Hussein is really, really hard to resist.

CJ said...

I was just kidding, doll. You know I love you.

Sterculian Rhetoric said...

A tip of my US Civil War Rebel hat to you girlfriend. Well done.

"...Gallow-dayo, ..."

Come Mr. Tallyman tally me bananas.
Daylight come and me want go home.

Ohhh, I thought you said Day-O.....nevermind then.

Morgan said...

And a curtsy in return, my dear SR.
And I'm digging the banana song.

Anonymous said...

That's very funny what you did with the song but the footage of the execution is very disturbing. It seems like it will just make things worse.
God Bless You
Margaret

Morgan said...

Margaret,
The cellphone shootage that just popped up on the web in the last 12 hours is disturbing. It comes across more as an mob lynching than a state-ordered execution.
Like everything else the U.S. has had its hands in, the rush to do things our way (and I believe that the U.S. likely urged the Iraqis to fast-track this, despite official denials) it will only make things much, much worse.

sammyray said...

Morgan, good job!!!

I can't help but watch that footage and be impressed with the dignity that Saddam showed in those final moments. If only he'd spent his life acting with such nobility, perhaps his end would have come with a noose around his neck.

Anonymous said...

Yes, yes! I couldn't think what bothered me about the hanging but you hit the nail on the head. It did really end up as a lynching. I fear you are right and that this will only fuel the anger over there.
God Bless You,
Margaret

Morgan said...

Sammyray,

They had a translation of the cellphone video on CNN. While Saddam seemed angry at being taunted, I too feel he maintained his composure far more than I could, especially as he ignored his tormenters and began to pray.
There was one fellow on the tape who rebuked the executioners and plead with them to stop taunting Hussein. "The man is being executed," I think he said. And whether his concern was for Saddam or for the image the group was projecting I don't know, but either way he was right.

Now, don't interpret what I say as Sympathy for the Devil. Saddam got his karmic payback in that execution chamber, but I don't think his killers helped their karma in the process.

And analysis aside, I'm glad you enjoyed my little parody. Sometimes if I didn't see the humor in current events I'd feel completely hopeless.

Sterculian Rhetoric said...

As I am 12 hours ahead of you lot, I can assure you that 2007 is no different than 2006, so far at least.

I should have said:

"Come Mr. Taliban, tally me a bomb-belt.
Daylight come and me want go boom."

Shrubbery said...

Somewhere the ghost of Freddie Mercury is cringing and planning your lyrical demise.

Morgan said...

"Come Mr. Taliban, tally me a bomb-belt.
Daylight come and me want go boom."

Hahaha!!!
And SR brings my New Year in with a lyrical bang. Thanks, VD and BP.

Shrubbery, If you read the fine print you'll see I already apologized the Freddie Mercury's ghost. It was the least I could do. ;-)

mitzibel said...

Yeah, you might have to turn in your hippie identification card after that one, but it was *so* worth it. Gut-splittingly hilarious, it was.

Morgan said...

Mitzibel, even as we speak I'm being stripped of my patchouli oil, hemp necklaces, handmade wardrobe and rolling papers.
I prepare for the walk of shame, in which my dreadlocked brethren turn their back on me as I walk from the commune and back into a society that glamorizes both consumerism and the War Machine.

OK. Not really. Try as they might, I will not allow my hippie detractors to trample my free speech rights under their dirty bare feet. I will chain myself to the commune walls in protest and leave them scratching their heads as they ponder how to forcibly remove me without looking like "The Man."

Glad you liked the parody and I hope you have a very, very good 2007.

Suspect said...

As Freddy Mercury would say, Another One Bites the Dust.

Morgan said...

Suspect, that would have also made for an apt parody.
Hope your New Year is a good one!

CJ said...

I don't have any pity for Saddam Hussein. So what if he was taunted? It wasn't any worse than what he did to his victims. If anything he got off easy.

Morgan said...

CJ, I don't have any sympathy for Saddam either. If anyone deserved a painful, humiliating death he certainly did and it would have been just desserts if he'd had his limbs broken before being dunked in a vat of mustard gas. Hanging was really too easy a death for him.

But for a country already sliding into civil war along sectarian lines, to see Shiites mocking a former Sunni leader will have a terrible ripple effect. For the sake of the people, not for the sake of Saddam, the execution should have been carried out in a more digified manner.

Evan said...

A friend at work sent me the link to this. It's brilliant. Thanks for the laugh.

Anonymous said...

Hi Morgan! I hope all is well with you. I've checked in several times but no new posts. I hope everything is all right.
God Bless You,
Margaret

Morgan said...

Margaret,
Everything is fine. I've just been far too busy with real life to blog much lately. Some paying work, the christening of a beloved friend's infant, a leisurely Sunday movie date with Larry and the children---these things have kept me happily occupied.
I have some ideas for future posts and hope to get to them in short order. But in my absence please be comforted that I'm finding joy in everyday life.

thimscool said...

Joy without us? That's inspiring. ;p

Morgan said...

Ha, thimscool. It is difficult to do but somehow I manage. *grin*
Really though, I've just had so much going on, including the cultivation of a few prospects for income generation in this New Year.
Hope 2007 brings great things for you, the wife and that adorable Atticus.

Anonymous said...

I wish I had a real life outside of the internet. I envy those who do because the blogs have become my life and I hardly think I'm the only dysfunctional person who sees blogs as the only way to communicate. If the are down as some were today I feel very lonely and disconnected. After a few good days around the holidays I seem to have slid into a post Christmas funk and am afraid to go out again.
God Bless You,
Margaret

Morgan said...

I meant no offense, Margaret. I know you have an anxiety disorder, and for someone incapable of getting out for health reasons the Internet can play an important role.

That said, I can't help but to wonder why anyone who can get out and form friendships or romances with real people choose to ignore those opportunities (or their own families in many cases) in favor of a virtual existence where so little is ever as it seems. Perhaps, though, that is the attraction. It's not something I can even pretend to understand.

Anonymous said...

In one low point I became addicted to the Internet. It was at a time when I felt very alone. But I soon realized the people who appeared to be online all of the time were often even unhappier than I was and often very dishonest. I have worked since then to carefully choose where I go. Blogs like this where there is interesting conversation and no bickering or agendas are better for me than the ones where people form clicks that leave little room for outside life.
God Bless You,
Margaret

Morgan said...

Margaret,

I've made myself cut ties with some people on the Net for the very same reasons and now exercise more discernment in choosing online "friends." As a general rule, I've noticed that the people who seek to sell an image of themselves to others are best avoided. I think generally people who can't make it professionally or romantically in real life seek to reinvent their reality on the Internet. If you've failed in your career or relationship ambitions, the Internet can be your fallback -a place where you can recast yourself as attractive,exciting, brilliant and accomplished. And because like attracts like it won't take long for you to cultivate an audience of similar folk who will say just what you need to hear.

Is that a bad way to live? For someone with nothing else to look forward to, perhaps not. The people who put up these sort of attention-seeking blogs are looking for validation and acceptance and it's probably easier to get that from strangers than it is from people who really know them.

But bottom line, if you're really happy you don't need to blog about what a good life you have. (If you have a good life you likely don't have much time to blog anyway.) If you're a good writer, you don't need to blog about what a good writer you are. If you're happy being single or childless or married or a mother then to go on and on about it eventually smacks of someone trying to convince themselves, not their audience. I've seen entire blogs devoted to being "child-free" or an atheist. If you don't want kids or don't believe in God, that's fine, but it's stupid to try and recruit others to your point of view. I have children and adore them, but children aren't for everyone. Neither is a religious-free life. I'd feel pretty ridiculous to put up a blog advocating parenthood or religious life for everyone else. What would be the point?

Anonymous said...

I believe people who do what you describe may not be trying to recruit but just looking for other people like them. You know what they say: misery loves company. If a woman wants kids but can't find a partner or can't conceive it might be easier to sit around and share sour grapes than it is to be alone. If she and her new friends can convince themselves that being childless is better than motherhood then she will feel less like a failure.
I suppose it is much the same for people who become atheists because they are angry at God. Most people are believers so again recruiting or finding other atheists will make them feel less ostracized.
I'm puzzled at something you said though about advocating a religious life. Are you religious. from what I have read of your blog I thought you not to be.
God Bless You,
Margaret

thimscool said...

Margaret, I have a suggestion.

It is time for you to start your own blog.

I suggest that your topic should be forays into the real. I suggest that you use it as a journal about your own struggle to overcome the grip of the unreal, online dystopia.

Even if no one comments, this might still be a very valuable experience. But if I knew about it, and it were well composed, I would probably comment.

sammyray said...

I miss you, Morg :(

Morgan said...

Margaret,
No I am *not* religious. I completely misspoke. I think I'm more along the lines of observant, but with no particular religious persuasion, although I was quite impressed during a recent visit to an Episcopalean church where my friend's infant was christened.

Thimscool,
Margaret will likely find your request a familiar one. I've privately suggested she start her own blog more than once, as I believe it would be a help to others suffering from similar disorders that keep them housebound. And Thimscool, come to think of it, when are *you* going to start your own blog with pictures of Atticus and the cats!

Margaret,
Forgive me. I'm *not* trying to put you on the spot.But let me say publicly that "I told you so" --you do have something worth saying despite your claims to the contrary. :-) And if an astute reader like Thimscool thinks so that's more of an endorsement than even I can offer. So, if you do change your mind and enter blogdom as a commentator rather than a reader, you're assured a Top-Of-My-Page link.

Sammyray
I've been so incredibly busy lately with freelance work, family stuff and (keep your fingers crossed) a new business venture. But I did find time to ordain my cat yesterday. She's now Rev. Jingles. Expect a post forthcoming.

thimscool said...

Me blog? No frickin way. That would pretty much ensure that I never got anything done. I'm too much of a perfectionist, and I've got about five rods in the fire as it is.

I should simply satisfy my Socratic cravings, by invading other blogs. Moreover, I lack talent or enthusiasm for visually oriented aesthetic creation… so I prefer to scratch that itch vicariously through my daily appreciation of the blogs that I visit… like this one.

So, at the risk of being pushy, I have to comment that your lack of production is seriously upsetting my aesthetic balance, and makes me want to paint everything gray. Pictures of an ordained cat would probably set me at ease, though.

Anonymous said...

Morgan and thimscool thanks, both of you. You really made my day with your comments. But I don't want to start a blog. Given my past experience I'm afraid I would revert back to unhealthy patterns and hang on it waiting for comments and obsessing over lack of readership or criticism. In the past I gave way too much validity to online people who I never met or ever will meet, people who often turned out to be complete liars. I admit I even lied a bit myself but it was just so easy to get friends that way. I don't want to let myself go to that place again. I'd like to think I could be like Morgan and keep the blogging in perspective but I don't think I could. I'd get too wrapped up in it and that would just be an excuse to stay indoors. It's better for me to just keep a private journal and add my two cents to other blogs. I limit my online time and forced myself to walk around the block three times this week. If you knew me you would know that is a real victory. I have lost eight pounds since Christmas! Lots to go but it is a start.
God Bless You
Margaret

thimscool said...

:)

Farnsworth said...

Absolutely brilliant!
And this is from someone who knows brilliant parody when he sees it -- for example check out The Radical Veteran song parodies.

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El Borak said...

Beautiful, Morgan. Perfection might have been yours if instead of "carry on" you had worked in "carrion." But it's always best if your finest writing is still in your future.

Carry on ;)