Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Porn, Counterporn


The following is the first in what will hopefully be an ongoing roundtable discussion of social issues between me, and two gentlemen I hold in high regard - Shrub and Billy D. We've all agreed to give each other equal time on our respective blogs, so that our readers can extol the brilliance of our viewpoints, or tell us how we're going straight to Hell.

This week's topic is porn, and whether its hot, sticky sweetness should be regulated. What follows are our varying opinions.

Ladies first. Here's my view:

Some people download porn. Others view it surreptitiously before clearing their history, lest their spouse find out what they're doing. Still others crusade against it as part of what is Wrong With Society.

I produce it.

I write erotica, which some people consider pornography. The difference is that I don't deal in dirty pictures; I just help people create them in their heads. It started during a work lull several years ago when - after reading the "Sleeping Beauty" series I cast it aside in disgust. How many times can you read about some breathless masochist getting spanked and then sexually subjugated before the tiillating kinkiness of it becomes downright ridiculous?

"I can do better than this," I thought.

And so I did.

My little sideline occupation may take some by surprise, but it wouldn't if you knew how well it pays. With kids in college and other equally pressing expenses, I can't be too picky, and writing dirty stories has become a growing part of my income. Respected co-workers who know I pen tawdry fare under a variety of pseudonyms are sympathetic when I'm forced to turn down assignments because of my "other work." I've been frank enough to tell them that I'll write more when they can afford to pay enough to make a completely honest woman of me.

So that's my dirty little secret. You may wonder if after a few hours of churing out stories of strapping dominant men and wantonly submissive women whether I run to the showers in an attempt to wash away the taint of my profession. Perhaps I would, if I considered what I'm doing to be wrong. I personally do not. You know the old saying, "If it turns you on, it's pornography; if it turns me on, it's erotic."

And therein lies the dilemma. Pornography can be hard to define. To a religous zealot looking to save people from themselves, that art book of tasteful nudes at the local library is considered pornography. To the deviant sex addict, the same art book would have to contain a shot of a transsexual doing it with two midgets and a Great Dane to deserve the word.

Before you can restrict pornography, you must first define what it is. Who's going to do that? Jerry Falwell? Larry Flynt? To be fair, you'd have to have both opinions represented. If you got such polar opposites together, do you think they could ever agree? Hell would freeze over, thaw out and freeze over again before that would happen.

Then there's the issue of the Internet. Even if laws were passed in the U.S., it would be impossible to regulate sites from other countries. Already, many skittish U.S. pornographers - worried about the influence of the religious right here - are moving their base of operations to other countries for that very reason.

Dirty pictures and stories depicting nudity and sex acts between consenting adults should be left alone. Pornographic pictures and stories involving children should - of course - be illegal and anyone trafficking or viewing them should be prosecuted. Same goes for pornographic images depicting people who've been coerced or otherwise forced into compromising positions against their will.

Pornography is a voluntary pursuit. Do people get addicted? Yes. Can people with pornographic obsessions be dangerous? Yes. But so can people addicted to alcohol. And just as we don't restrict alcohol because there are alcoholics, we shouldn't restrict access to pornography because there are dangerous sex addicts. Like social drinkers, purveyors of porn aren't generally dangerous. They're just horny.

If you're against pornography, don't view it. If you're worried about the influence of pornography on your children, install filtering software. Better yet, keep the computer in the family room and watch what your kids are viewing. They're likely to see as much skin on their friends My Space page as they are on any porn site. But don't try to regulate it. If the wrong - or extreme right - people start calling the shots, you might end up getting excited by the shot of a bare ankle. And that's no fun for anyone, except maybe those guys with a foot fetish.

Here are Billy D's thoughts on the subject:

So what’s wrong with a little porn? Well, quite a bit, in my opinion. Maybe it’s because I have two daughters who I would rather didn’t grace the pages of Playboy, or some seedy internet site.

Optical prostitution is the reality of it. Paying a woman (or a man) to take their clothes off is akin to any other sexual favor for money. This is just without physical contact between the two entities. You’re just using the other person involved for a different means of sexual gratification for money.

Now, before we get too far into this, let me say up front, I’m not a prude in any sort of way. And as far as this conversation goes, let me say this now: I fully support the right of two consenting adults to make their own decisions as to their level, if any, of involvement in pornography. It’s not going away, is a multi-billion dollar business, and I’d much rather have the vast majority be willing participants in it than non. Having said that, that also doesn’t make it right.

It is legal, provided everyone involved is over eighteen, and prohibition hasn’t worked for any other vice it’s ever been tried on, this would be no different. Any attempt to de-legitimize the profession now would only force it underground, where what little control we have left (not much!) over content would be lost.

Now, when I say the word pornography, what comes to mind? A naked woman? Maybe a couple in a film? How about two women totally out of their heads on drugs having anal intercourse with a pair of horses? It’s all porn, it’s all the same, and it’s all available at the tip of your fingers.
How about the negative consequences pornography? What about the effects of it on society as a whole? Many of you reading this right now have children. Do you want your daughters seen as just something to insert a penis into, or an entity only present to satisfy unquestioningly a man’s physical desire no questions asked, regardless of what that may be?

What about those of you with sons? Is this how you want them to view women? Cause, don’t forget, that’ll include their sisters and their mother. (All of these women are someone’s sister or daughter or mother, etc.) Do you want your children growing up with the notion that the things they see in porn films are normal everyday occurrences? I doubt it. Homosexuality, bestiality, multiple partners of both sexes… I won’t even get into the fecapheliacs and the "pee people".
With but a passing mention of it destroying marriages, or even pre-marriage relationships, think about what it does to a person’s brain. Eventually, they become so desensitized to it, it becomes the norm to them. People become adjusted to the perversion, and eventually their reality becomes that perversion. The "everybody does it" sense kicks in.

Now, all of these reasons listed should be enough to persuade the average person of the "perils of porn" but as a Christian, let me just ask this:

Do you really think this kind of stuff is "OK" with the Lord? I mean really? Committing adultery in your heart on a daily basis is not a good way to show God just how committed you are to your marriage, is it? Is this how you plan to show him how you loved your sisters here in this life? Instead of doing what you could to save one of His daughters from throwing her self-esteem and dignity down a toilet, you paid her to do it? Good luck with that.


Finally, the Shrub Speaks:

As a died-in-the-wool purveyor of porn I get rather incensed at the anti-smut crowd and their clarion call for tighter restrictions on so-called obscenity.

The root of my problem with these fanatics is their definition of pornography and obscenity. New York City Police Detective Raymond Pierce (Ret.) penned a controversial book examining the link between porn and violent crime. In an interview he proffered the following definition for pornography, "For me it's anything written, spoken, printed, photographed or videotaped to elicit a sexual response from an individual." This definition is at best nebulous; at worst it is vague and indecipherable.

In fact, Pierce states there is no need to differentiate between soft-core and hard-core porn. He sees no difference between Phoebe Cates dropping her top in Fast Times at Ridgemont High and Jenna Jameson showing her private parts in a manner that would make a gynecological exam superfluous.

The Supreme Court has defined obscenity as: 1) That the average person, applying contemporary community standards, would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest; AND 2) That the work depicts or describes in a patently offensive way, as measured by contemporary community standards, sexual conduct specifically defined by the applicable law; AND 3) That a reasonable person would find that the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, political and scientific value.

Therein lies the problem. In order to effectuate a coherent debate one must settle on a tangible set of parameters as a framework. Pierce, et al. aren’t concerned with such niceties, they just want action. Other anti-porn zealots; Steven Baldwin, President Bush, John Ashcroft, Dr. James Dobson, Andrea Dworkin, and Jerry Falwell have led an assault on pornography since the 70’s. Many of these activists display little knowledge of the First Amendment and its protections and fail to forward a coherent standard by which to judge so-called obscene material.

Now, there’s no disputing the fact that obscene material is not protected by the First Amendment’s free speech provisions. Certain types of pornography are, by definition, illegal. Child porn and snuff porn are illegal per se as the act depicted is otherwise illegal. Other forms of porn are highly restricted in a number of states. Beastiality, sexual torture, and depictions of rape are restricted and form the grey area of illegal pornography. Quite literally all other types of smut are OK. The anti-porn cabal would expand the definition of obscenity to include nearly all types of porn. Pierce would advocate for a nearly limitless prohibition on ANY depiction of a sexual act, be it written, photography, or otherwise.

The porn industry in the U.S. generates more revenue than the four major professional sports leagues COMBINED and more than ABC, CBS, and NBC put together, an annual profit of $12 billion, $54 billion world wide. There are currently 4.2 million pornographic web sites, 68 million porn searches, and over 2.5 billion pornographic emails sent every day, 8% of all email traffic. Twenty percent of all males admit to looking at internet porn whilst at work. Fully 40 million adults admit to looking at smut on a regular basis in America. Click here to read more.
Given the pervasive nature of pornography and the fact that tens of millions access porn each day, saying that porn definitively causes violent behavior is akin to claiming ingestion of Ramen inexorably leads to the same behavior. Pierce and his anti-porn brethren, however, would have you believe that systematic perusal of smut will lead one to commit heinous crimes. This connection is tenuous at best.

Which brings me to my point…if you don’t like porn avert your eyes. Don’t use your bully pulpit to squelch free expression, especially when if one asked 100 different people for a definition of what porn and obscenity is one would get 100 different answers. Barring a definitive proof that smut causes violent and lawless behavior, which as yet is impossible to prove, pornography is and should be protected speech. If you want to see porn related violence, try taking porn away, now were talking violent uprisings. As Charlton Hesston put it, "From my cold dead hands", just substitute me for Moses and Playboy for the rifle and you’ve got our poster.

So, in this humble blogger’s opinion, to quote a rather famous scene from a famous movie starring Michael Douglass, "Porn is good, porn works."

32 comments:

Billy D said...

"whether its hot, sticky sweetness should be regulated."

Hahaha...nice.

Morgan said...

Well, I felt compelled to sex it up a bit.
Your avatar is killing me everytime I look at it. I still am dying to know the story behind it. Is that you?

Billy D said...

No. It's not me. It's just a picture I found years ago that I thought was just insane. I'm much scarier than the guy in that photo. I used to have a photo of me on my site, but removed when I started getting e-mails from some psychotics for a while. (Everything from threats to nude photos and marriage offers) So, I killed the blog for a while until the nuts went elsewhere. I only started again about a month or so ago. (I blamed it on my new job)

Erik said...

Morgan,

I have often found it both interesting and frustrating that women freak about visual porn (guy porn) but they think that the romance novels they read are not porn (girl porn). Somehow their pursuits of a thrill are okay, but a man's similar pursuit is disgusting.

It is something that I was discussing with my wife last night and am going to post upon soon. (sonner or later anyways)

dlkjdfsa said...

I'm disappointed Billy, all this time I thought that was you. Email can be scary. I got one from a Jesus freak that scared me. Here it is....

After listening to you (I have met you)and reading, I have come to the conclusion that you need help. The kind of help a good Christian warrior can provide. You know, we were very good at forcing people to accept our way of thinking.

can't wait to see you again

Morgan said...

Billy D, I am disappointed. I thought that was you in the rabbit suit and was going to right a story about a guy named Thumper who worked on a rabbit farm and hooked up with a Playboy Bunny. Now I'm too depressed to write it.

Morgan said...

Erik, guys are more visually oriented. Photos don't do a whole lot for women, which I think is why Playgirl never was as popular a Playboy.

And you're right. Trashy romance novels can be very pornographic. Years ago, I devoured Beatrice Small novels, which were steamy bodice-ripping fare before the feminists got her ear and removed the "Oh-no-please-don't-here-let-me-help-you" scenes that made her work so deliciously wicked.

And even though they read like a Penthouse letter, women could get them at the bookstore and deny that they were porn due to their being sold in respectable shops, rather than from behind the counter down at the 7-11.

Morgan said...

"After listening to you (I have met you)and reading, I have come to the conclusion that you need help. The kind of help a good Christian warrior can provide. You know, we were very good at forcing people to accept our way of thinking."

Sounds like someone has a Crusader complex. Although, after the exchange I had today, I wonder. I was commenting to my sister today that some self-professed Christians can turn plain mean if you don't accept theology as they present it.

I hope whoever sent that did so in jest, but you never know....

dlkjdfsa said...

I have a pretty strong philosophy on my website. For a few months, I was chilling behind "Saint Louie's Cathedral" in the heart of the French Quarter NOLA, handing out the 10 page pamphlet prophetizing. I would shout, "Understanding Zero" which caught many peoples interest. But when I had grandma's lookin' at me like they wanted to kill me, I knew I was tempting fate.

If you've ever been to Mardi Gras you most likely have seen the hard core Bible thumpers with there hate signs and megaphones. Screaming that God is coming to inflict pain on the sinners of sin city. I know for a fact that many of them were packin' heat. Can you believe, I still don't believe, even after big K?

I'm sure the person that wrote me the hate mail has a full arsenal and would love to clean this earth of filth like me. I went into perpetual motion to keep people from hunting me. I've been traveling the country in a minivan going into churches of all types asking questions and trying to make them do the same. Before they have time to find me, I'm in a different location. I'm doing this because I really am searching for the truth and want other people to stop just taking the "mans" word for it. I wouldn't expect anyone to just take my word for it but I still haven't found anything that fits more logically into my observations of this world than my text. I'm still open to the possibility of being wrong, you have to be when you us logic. I knew violence was to be expected when one sets out on a mission to make people question there faith. Questioning faith is painful, I accepted the risks, it was easy as I am not afraid of death.

Morgan said...

Good for you, Robert. A fellow traveler. I like that.

I confess to having more questions than answers, and am still enough of a rube to be genuinely perplexed when professing Christians tell me how much they hate me. Or say they'd like to kill me. And they have.

I guess when they look at their "What Would Jesus Do?" bracelet, the answer is always the same: Kill everyone who disagrees.

Of course, this is understandable. The Bible says, "Love one another," which - when literally interpreted - means "kill them."

I've not yet risen to the higher plane of Christianity that makes me want to hate anyone or hurt them. I guess I need to pray harder or something.

Today, on another blog, I made the mistake of saying that Jesus was tolerant, and that perhaps one shouldn't rub Christ's face in his sacrifice by using grace as an excuse to hate people.

One of the Christians called me a "bitch" for my views.

Glory!

The rabid professing Christians you describe remind me of the ones who picket soldiers' funerals holding up signs saying "God Hates Fags."

I have to think that if Christ came back today and saw what was being done in his name, he'd throw up.

prettylady said...

Awesome round table, Morgan! Interestingly, I share your views on porn/erotica completely. I believe that such things are essential tools, when used sparingly, much like a shot of tequila for settling the stomach when one has encountered an uncertain dairy product. I understand the problem of sex addiction, but regulating pornography seems like a wrong-end-of-the-stick solution.

prettylady said...

some self-professed Christians can turn plain mean if you don't accept theology as they present it.

Woosh, they certainly can. Communication can be quite the challenge. ;-)

Morgan said...

"Communication can be quite the challenge. ;-)"

Yes, it can. I guess what puzzles me is that if it looks like we're at loggerheads, after a bit I'm willing to say, "You know, we're not going to agree." But I don't end up hating anyone for disagreeing with me.

When the " True Christians" go into full "foaming-at-the-mouth" mode and declare that they hate you, one has to wonder..

Morgan said...

"Awesome round table, Morgan! Interestingly, I share your views on porn/erotica completely."

Thanks, I'm glad BillyD and Shrub and I did this.


"I understand the problem of sex addiction, but regulating pornography seems like a wrong-end-of-the-stick solution"

A few times in conversations with other writers of erotica or people who produce harder stuff, the debate has surfaced over whether porn fuels or leads to deviant sexual behavior. Most of us see it as an outlet, a chance for the majority of people - kinky or not -to heighten their sexual feelings alone or with someone else.
You can have two people addicted to porn - one who does nothing ut look at the other who ends up hurting someone. It's the difference between the alcoholic who stays home passes out every night in his chair surrounded by beer cans and the alcoholic who gets behind the wheel.

You can't really blame the porn any more than you can blame the alcohol. It's OK to feed fantasies unless their illegal (snuff, child sex).

Morgan said...

"unless their illegal" should have reads "unless they're illegal."

scooterhawk said...

MOTL:
I've been reading your blog for awhile now and your various post over on Vox's site and I'm a bit confused by seeming contradictions in your profession of the Christian faith. You state here that you find nothing wrong with writing erotica, yet Christ, in the beatitudes said "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that every one who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart
So my tow questions to you would be: 1. How, as a Christian woman, can you justify producing a product that at worst causes others to sin and at best may act as a stumbling block to those who are either weaker in faith than yourself or do not know Christ at all? 2. More importantly, how does your profession show your “light” and how does it reflect God’s glory?

scooterhawk said...

that should have read my two questions.

Morgan said...

Scooterhawk, that is a fair question.

First of all, I write erotica. I don't deal in images. Lusting after a character in one of my stories would be like lusting after the Easter bunny. It's not real.

Women are the primary purveyors of erotic literature. It boosts the fantasy life, and the husband is the beneficiary of his wife's ardor.

I don't care for dirty pictures, but as I stated in my roundtable post, I don't believe that anyone can define porn. I get the impression that you'd be afraid to thumb through a lingerie catalog, lest you see something that could cause you to lust.

Your second question, "How does it reflect God's glory." My work reflects God's glory no more or no less than it would if I were sitting in an office crunching numbers.

Our take on sexuality, I would imagine, is vastly difference. I don't see anything dirty or nasty about sex. If someone reads a dirty story, looks at a dirty picture and finds it exciting or beautiful they're reacting to a God-given urge. Obviously they shouldn't direct that sexual energy outside of their own Biblical interpretation of acceptability, but porn in itself is not to blame; ultimately it's the individual's responsibility.

Morgan said...

Scooterhawk, you may want to go down to the local ABC store and put the same question to the owner, since alcohol could lead to addiction. Or you could ask the manager at your local McDonalds if he or she feels convicted about selling Big Macs to obese people, since gluttony is also a sin.

scooterhawk said...

Morgan:
Thank you for

scooterhawk said...

Morgan:

Thank you for your response. I had a feeling that you were going to parse Jesus’ commandment on adultery. First, since the Ten Commandments apply universally to both men and women I believe we can safely substitute “man” with “woman” and ‘her” with “his” in Christ’s teaching. Unless you believe that only men can initiate adultery. Second, the delivery system used to purvey the sin isn’t really the issue (graphic vs. literal) nor does it really matter whether the object of the person’s lust is real or imaginary. Jesus is teaching that the lust is the sin and adultery is the result of that sin.

I don’t think sex is dirty either. I’m happily married with a baby on the way. No, I’m not afraid of the Victoria Secrets catalog that arrives every month or so in the mail. However, I am mindful of the advertiser’s intent.

Funny you should mention number crunching since that is what I do. Honest work glorifies God. If you feel accounting is not honest then we can discuss it.

Judging whether not selling someone a drink or a Big Mac is a sin would depend on the intent of the seller, since the act of drinking and eating is not scripturally forbidden. Is it the seller’s intention to get the buyer drunk or to induce gluttony? Each man is responsible for his own soul, but again we as Christians are not to be stumbling blocks to others. I want to ask my question to you again Morgan, your job is to write material for the express purpose of inducing lust in your readers. As a Christian woman is this work something that glorifies your walk with Christ?

I want to stress that I’m not attempting to be derisive or judgmental Morgan and I certainly don’t hate you. =) Please take my questioning as humble attempt understand my sister’s heart.

Amber said...

Wow, Morgan, you write erotica and make money at it? I'm so very envious. I used to write about our own intimacy on my blog and enjoyed doing it. Until I got a bit too freaked out about sharing so much with the vast public and stopped. So then I thought, hey, maybe I should try writing erotica! You know, take what we do and put it in a story with characters.

It's friggin' hard. I gave up. I suck. I really do! *laughs* I wish very much I could do it; kudos to you, Morgan. That's awesome. :-)

As to porn, I've long called bodice-ripper or romance novels "porn for women" and I use that comparison every chance I get when some wives start bemoaning their husband's desires to look at nekkid pictures some times. Yes, men are usually more visual than women. For us, it's more in our heads. My husband is continually amazed by what's going on in my head when I'm fantasizing about him. Very elaborate fantasies. Heh. His are very straightforward and simple; mine are vast and filled with lots of details.

As far as daughters go, they do grow up into women who hopefully have been taught the strength to make their own choices and not allow *anyone* to treat them in a way that they are not comfortable with. My daughter is 28 now and I always thought she was a little prudish. To my great surprise, she told me some time back while we were yakking about life and love and the world that she looks at porn and enjoys certain kinds. She is very specific about what kind she likes though. "Clean porn" as she put it, which made me feel several things at once. One, laugh hysterically because that is SO what she would watch based on how well I know her. Two, once again, it put me through that odd feeling of being forced to relate to my grown children as adults and that's always a weird feeling.

But most of all I was glad that she has no problem identifying what she likes about sexual fantasy. What turns her on.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, she certainly didn't sound like she felt threatened or victimized. And you know, neither do I. Porn isn't for children, after all, but for adults. It's inappropriate for a 15 year old to watch it or read it. Just like they shouldn't drink or gamble. They are not old enough to fully understand or be aware of those kinds of adult play.

But she's an adult now and she knows what she likes and she is a very strong woman.

I mean, porn is fantasy. Sure, we suspend the reality so we can enjoy the erotic book, or the nasty pictures, or the bedroom "scene" but it's still just fantasy.

The problem is when people take porn so very seriously. It's not serious. Would you take a spy novel or an action movie seriously? Healthy adults know the difference between fantasy and reality. Just because a small minority doesn't "get" that doesn't mean we should ALL suffer for their issues.

As for objectification of women...well. Again. As long as everyone knows it's a fantasy, that can be very very hot for some women. Like me. I'm glad I have an understanding and willilng husband who can switch gears that way. He adores me as his beloved wife and best friend but if I want to be objectified as a sex object in the bedroom, he's happy to oblige me. Thank god because some of my very best orgasms have happened that way. :-)

Morgan said...

"Jesus is teaching that the lust is the sin and adultery is the result of that sin."

Could you kindly tell me who a reader is lusting about when he or she reads erotic literature?


"I want to ask my question to you again Morgan, your job is to write material for the express purpose of inducing lust in your readers. As a Christian woman is this work something that glorifies your walk with Christ?"

Getting back to what I said before, the majority of readers of women's erotica are women - mostly married women. Again, you seem to think lust is a sin, even if is lust a woman directs towards her husband. If she's so worked up over a story that she greets him at the door wearing a teddy, who am I to complain? Sex lives get in a slump from time to time. A bit of spice can liven it up. So no, I don't have a bit of guilt about writing the stories.

Certainly, unmarried women may read the erotica and use it to masturbate (horrors!!!) or to read whilst in bed with their lover. (more horrors. And a gasp!!) But like the McDonald's, I have no idea if my product is going to be "apporpriately" consumed or gobbled up in a sinful gluttony.

"Each man is responsible for his own soul, but again we as Christians are not to be stumbling blocks to others."

Again, I think we come back to a difference in philosophy, Scooterhawk. If you consider being horny a stumpbling block, then I plead guilty. I personally do not. Judging by my email, my writings have inspired many a married woman to revive her inner wanton, much to her man's delight. Given that good sex helps make good marraiges, I'd say that's a blessing!

"I want to stress that I’m not attempting to be derisive or judgmental Morgan and I certainly don’t hate you. =) Please take my questioning as humble attempt understand my sister’s heart."

Taken as such, sweets. I don't see your comments as derisive or judgemental and I absolutely do not think you hate me.

I'm glad we got into this discussion. It was a long time in coming and I was a bit surprised no one dared call me on it sooner.

When's your wee one due?

Morgan said...

Just a clarification. Just because a woman feels lust doesn't mean she's going to direct it outside the marriage. I'd be very sad if, as a married woman, you told me you'd never experienced lust. I willingly admit feeling extremely lusty with my husband.

As you pointed out, hunger doesn't always lead to gluttony. My point is that lust doesn't always lead to adultery.

scooterhawk said...

Morgan:

I guess will have to agree to disagree on this topic. Unfortunately, my mind is a bit more plodding and methodical than that of Vox, Nate, WhiteBuffalo et al. so, perhaps my arguments lack their intellectual weight. If you’ll allow me, I’ll pick up the subject with you later through email or if you prefer continue it on this board. I believe as Christian is it vitally important to understand how our actions reflect Christ and how this influences others either to accept or reject Him.

Our baby (our 1st) is due July 8!

Morgan said...

"My husband is continually amazed by what's going on in my head when I'm fantasizing about him. Very elaborate fantasies. Heh. His are very straightforward and simple; mine are vast and filled with lots of details."

Amber, thanks for you great comments. This one really jumped out at me because among the comments I have received about my stories is that the women put themselves and their husbands in the place of the characters when they fantasize, so if I write about Lord Longcock taking the virginal Sarah Comely amid the heather, the reader sees her husband as Lord Longcock, and herself as Sarah.

And yes, details are what make it, and not just the sexual ones. Someone once said, good sex is as much between your ears as it is between your legs, and that is true.

In erotica, it's not just the sexual descriptions that titillate, but the descriptions of everything around it - the taste of the man's mouth when he kisses you, the feel of strawberry juice as it runs down your chin, the constriction of a herringbone bodice as the heaving breast strains against it.....

Erotica is a feast for the libido but so much more. And as lovely Scooterhawk can now see, married women use it to enhance their marriages.

Also, if it makes you feel any better, years ago when I first turned my pen towards erotica, I wasn't pleased with the result. So I worked on writing stories - just stories - and describing things in them, things people saw, ate, smelled. Later I phased in the sex stuff and detailing "action" became as naturally as describing the consumption of a delicious meal. ;-)

Morgan said...

"I guess will have to agree to disagree on this topic. Unfortunately, my mind is a bit more plodding and methodical than that of Vox, Nate, WhiteBuffalo et al. so, perhaps my arguments lack their intellectual weight."

Oh dear, please don't sell yourself short in comparison to those gentlemen. You did just fine. And you were gracious in debate and didn't call anyone a bitch, which is more than I can say for some of the VP crowd, who get a bit hot under the collar when you stand your ground.

Look, your argument carried plenty of intellectual weight with me. You made good points and I can only hope I returned the favor.

Agreeing to disagree is always better than just disagreeing. :-)

Congratulations on the baby. I have two good friends who are also due in July! Four of my five children were summer babies. My oldest daughter, now 20, was due in late July but was born in early August, as was my middle son.

I wish you joy and a easy delivery. :-)

prettylady said...

Scooterhawk, I want to second all of Morgan's comments on the use of erotica to strengthen one's marital sex life. I, personally, believe that such things can be invaluable when the inevitable slump sets in. Some women, myself included, are perfectly capable of forgetting about sex completely for long stretches of time, or of getting bored with the same ol', same ol' all the time. This puts a nearly unbearable strain on our partnerships and our mates. When such a thing happens, I believe that I am doing myself, God, and my partner a favor when I pull the Anais Nin off the shelf, read a couple of chapters, and think long and hard about them before my partner gets home.

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I made over $900 last month having fun!
make extra money

Anonymous said...

Very nice! I found a place where you can
make some nice extra cash secret shopping. Just go to the site below
and put in your zip to see what's available in your area.
I made over $900 last month having fun!
make extra money

Anonymous said...

Very nice! I found a place where you can
make some nice extra cash secret shopping. Just go to the site below
and put in your zip to see what's available in your area.
I made over $900 last month having fun!
make extra money

Anonymous said...

http://tramadol-sqllt.blogspot.com/
Dont forget!